Tag Archives: happiness

Trust the Process

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I’m not a religious person, but a lot of my dear friends are so I wanted to put my belief and trust in the universe/process into words that they can use daily. Stay with me.

We often don’t reach for our dreams because we don’t understand how to get there. However, when we look at the past we can see how things came together, and everything fell into place, to make our current situation a reality. Even if in you’re in a bad place, your actions and decisions have led to this point. Hindsight is 20/20.

Now, looking into the future, I want you to focus on your goals and dreams. Isaiah 43:18 & 19 says “Do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland.” In other words, as you focus on the future, and as you imagine your dreams coming true the universal energy that makes up our existence is creating a way for it to happen. Trust that process. Whatever you call it (God, Spirit, Universe, Mother Earth, Source, etc) it represents the base vibration of our universe that creates energy. Everything, on a molecular level, vibrates thus creating energy. Therefore, everything is connected by this energetic field. We are energy, and everything that has been or ever will be is energy. If it weren’t then it wouldn’t exist. You must connect with the frequency of your dreams in order to achieve them. Albert Einstein said, “Everything is energy and that’s all there is to it. Match the frequency of the reality you want and you cannot help but get that reality. It can be no other way. This is not philosophy, this is physics.”

Now, let’s look at the verse quoted here. “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding.” In other words, trust the process. Even if you don’t know how you’ll make something happen I want you to focus on connecting with it and trust that things will fall into place to make it a reality. “In all your ways acknowledge him and he will make your path true.” Speak your dreams into existence, connect with them on an emotional and energetic level, then believe that those things will come to be. You still with me?

I was born and raised Christian but I never really understood this verse until I began my own study and research of the Law of Attraction. So if you’re not Christian I want you to replace the word Lord in this verse with the word Universe and read it again. We may often have to go through changes and experiences to achieve that which we desire, but each of those things are simply a step that can put you closer or further away from your goals. Hold your goal in your mind and focus on it, in everything you do do do it with your goal in sight, then trust that whatever steps are involved in the process (good or bad) will lead you to that goal.

Several years back I began to manifest my dream career, imagined running my own business, and saw myself helping people on a daily basis. I didn’t know how it would happen but I knew that it would. I had to lose two great jobs in order to be in the position where my dream could become real. At the time it was a devastating loss, but looking back now I understand that those things had to happen in order for me to move closer to my dream. When I relapsed in 2018 & got arrested I now know that had to happen in order to motivate me to turn my life around. However, even in my darkest time I still trusted the process and I still maintained my dreams and goals in my mind. I didn’t understand why those things were happening, but now I know I didn’t need to understand them in order to trust the process.

Ask yourself, “What are my goals in life?” Think of them daily and focus on connecting with them. Imagine you already have them. How does that feel? Really immerse yourself in those feelings. You have now connected with these goals on an emotional level. “Feeling” is just a word we invented to describe the energetic frequency that we are on. Remind yourself daily that you may not know the exact path you need to take to achieve a goal, but know that as long as you stay focused on accomplishing it things will come together for it to become your reality. You create your own reality. Speak it into existence!

Namaste,

Chase

Why are we afraid of commitment?

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Why are we afraid of commitment? Because when we commit to something it means we have to deliver. When we commit to a marriage, to a relationship, to a job, to a promise to someone, it means we have to get results. If we don’t then there are negative consequences. If we don’t deliver on our commitments then it means there will be broken hearts and hurt feelings. When we tell someone, “Oh I’ll try my best to do that” what you’re really saying is, “I’m afraid to commit to that but I’ll attempt it.” That way, you can do so without expectation of deliverance or results. But when you say this you are also saying, “This is not important enough for me to commit to and I’d still like the option of an excuse to get out of it.” “I’ll try” is your escape clause in the agreement!

When we fully commit to something then that means that there are no excuses! What we are really afraid of isn’t commitment at all, it’s the risk of failure. You’re afraid that relationship won’t work out, so you don’t commit. You’re afraid you won’t succeed at your new job, so you don’t commit. Then when you do fail at the job, or your relationship falls apart we ask ourselves why. It’s because the moment you refused to commit to it you set into motion the outcome you eventually received. If you decide to try for the promotion, but don’t go for it 110% then you may as well hang it up. When you refuse to commit then you begin to make room for excuses as to why it didn’t happen! “Well my boss doesn’t like me, my coworker was better, etc” You must give yourself permission to fail, but don’t you dare give yourself permission to never try! Your actions in life will show what you’re willing to commit to, they will show what’s important to you. If something is difficult then push through it. If it’s inconvenient, then do it while being uncomfortable. When you commit to something there will be things that happen that you can’t control or didn’t plan. When you allow those things to control the outcome you place their importance above that of what you were trying to commit to. But when those things do happen, when unexpected obstacles come up, how will you move past them? Don’t let them stop you. Keep going! Get creative with your results. Some of my clients will be stuck at an obstacle and say, “I don’t know what to do!” My response is, “Okay, but if you did know what to do what would it be?” That opens up possibilities that you may not have thought about. It makes your brain work differently than it was before. You have to be willing to get into the ring and fight those things that try to stop you from reaching your goals. Even if you think you can’t win, as long as you attempt to fight you may very well surprise yourself!

Even if you’re afraid of something do NOT let it stop you from reaching your goals. If your goals are big enough, and important enough, then no excuse will be good enough for you to not reach that goal. Do you REALLY want to save your marriage? Do you REALLY want that new job? Do you REALLY want that success? Then refuse to accept excuses and move forward prepared to fight however you have to in order to succeed.

Namaste,

Chase

Online Course: Happy Vibes Today!

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This is something I’ve wanted to do for a very long time, and I’ve finally done it! I have created an online course/program to walk people through the steps I not only take daily, but also the process involved in my healing that has taken several years.

Healing from trauma/loss/abuse, releasing the past, processing our emotions, and dealing with mistakes are not easy things to face, but through this program I will walk you through the steps I’ve learned over the years not only from some amazing therapy, but also from trial and error, and my own research into mental health and the science behind happiness!

Feel free to check out my FB PAGE HERE, or visit my newly launched website for more information or contact me with any questions. I’m so excited you’ve decided to join me on this journey, and I would love to have you along for the ride!

Namaste,

-Chase

2020 Vision

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As 2019 comes to a close people will inevitably start talking about their New Years Resolutions! Lose weight, save more money, cut back on splurges, go back to school, etc. However, you don’t have to have some huge drastic resolution. Most of those are left by the wayside by the end of February anyways. Sometimes the only resolution we can make is to just keep pushing forward and hopefully do better tomorrow than we did today. Granted, it’s not a “normal” resolution, but for me it is. There are days that I really struggle. Sometimes just getting out of bed before noon feels like an accomplishment and should be rewarded with at least a participation award. Yet other days I thrive and I’m up by 8am with coffee poured, music playing, laundry in the wash, and half of my house already cleaned by 9am. These are two very different days and I never know which one I’m going to have until it happens. I wake up in a great mood, or not so great mood, but how I handle that is on me. I can allow it to bother me and bring me down, or I can make myself go. I can continue through my morning routine of positive affirmations, stretching/yoga, listening to music, drinking coffee, cleaning house, playing with Maggie (my doggo!), and then starting work. Normally by the time I’m ready to start working my day has already changed for the better. It’s amazing what will happen when I focus on the positives and not the negatives. You’ll hear me say a lot (if you continue reading my blog, and I REALLY hope you do) that you must be an ACTIVE participant in your recovery. I take mental health meds every single morning, but that doesn’t mean I can remain in bed and expect them to magically work. Absolutely not! I have to work with them. I have to become more active, eat better, listen to upbeat music, read inspiring books, talk to positive happy people, and I have to be present. The medicine will only do so much, but we have to do part of the work too. It’s not easy, and sometimes it sucks, but it will only get worse if we don’t try. It’s like training for a marathon only to arrive on the day of the run and expect all your training will run the marathon for you. Nope, not how it works sugar! You have the skills and your muscles are stronger, but you still have to put forth the effort to get to the finish line. Let’s do it together!

I’ve already heard sooooo many people talking about 2020 vision for this coming year. Yeah, it’s a cute pun, but I wish I had 2020 vision for my future. I wish I had a crystal ball that could tell me everything that was going to happen in the next year so I could prepare for it. I wish I could see all the bad and good things that are going to happen, but I can’t. The lesson here is we have to learn to trust our higher power, whatever you may call it. I call it Spirit, some call it God. Whatever works for you, we have to believe that this Universe is too big for things to just happen. We are not always in control, and sometimes that for the best. Over the past two years I’ve had some wild stuff happen and it’s because I had quit being active in my recovery. I relapsed (on pain medicine and in my mental health), I quit doing the things I KNEW helped my mental illness, and I began to isolate myself, a lot. The crazy thing is that when it comes to those things I sort of do have 2020 vision. I know that if I start doing those things I will get worse, my mental health will decline, and typically a drug relapse is not far behind. Yet, when all this happens many of us think, “How did I not see this coming? How did I not catch it?” Well, chances are we did see it coming. And if we didn’t, I can assure you our family and friends saw it. When bad things happen, especially dealing with my addiction or mental health, I tend to say, “Well hindsight is 2020.” Yet it takes me a while to learn that if I had been more present each day I would’ve caught on to the downward spiral in which I was spinning. When you’re draining a tub you see the water going out, and you still have a chance to plug the drain before it all disappears, yet many of us (myself included) tend to get in this zone of just watching everything go down, mostly because we’re just downright exhausted. Then when the water is out of the tub we frantically plug the drain and pray that the water would just come back.

So for the year 2020 I encourage you to develop more 2020 vision when it comes to your mental health and/or addiction, or whatever problem you may be having. Become a present and active participant in your recovery and your health. I have even allowed close family and trusted friends to let me know if they see me headed in the wrong direction. As someone with depression and anxiety our brains often play tricks on us, but typically those outside of your head will see the signs that something is going wrong before you do. If you have a trusted friend or family member that you would be willing to hear this from then I encourage to to talk to them. I told my parents and best friend, “I don’t always notice when I’m getting bad so I need you guys to watch out for me. If you see something or start to notice a negative pattern please tell me so I can fix it before it gets worse.” I have been hospitalized three times and each time could’ve been prevented if I had been more present and proactive with my mental health.

So let’s go into 2020 with a clear vision of what we want and how we’re going to achieve it, and not just a bunch of empty resolutions with which we know we won’t follow through. Let’s be there for each other. Depression/Suicidal Ideation/Anxiety/Etc is a deadly, silent, and invisible illness. We MUST rely on our support systems to get us through the hard times. If you don’t have a support system then reach out to me. I love you guys! You’re stronger than you realize and we can do this. Let’s start this new year off right. Let’s make 2020 the best yet!

-Chase

*Feel free to email me anytime or follow my page on Facebook or Twitter 🙂

Dancing With My Dog

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I have these little things that I called Daily Dance Parties.  They.  Are.  A. Blast!!! Lol.  I literally crank up the music and dance like a stupid idiot for ten minutes, or sometimes longer if I’m cleaning.  What cracks me up is that sometimes my dog (a Maltese Yorkie mix) gets involved.  She’ll hop around on her back legs and it literally looks like she’s dancing, and I love it!  I know if anyone were to see me they’d have me committed (again), but I don’t really care.  I love my dance parties!

Sometimes shit happens, but you just gotta dance with your dog! 🙂

Broken Glass

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Why is it that we are always looking for happiness, but we refuse to do any work to get it?  Why do we read “self help” books, but not take the advice of the authors?  Happiness is not hard to obtain, and it simply involves changing the way you think.

Just the other night I had a friend of mine (who also happens to be a Shaman) over for dinner.  In the midst of cooking, a glass fell off the counter and shattered all over the floor.  I cleaned it up, threw it in the trash, and continued cooking.  I bought the glass at the Dollar Tree so I knew they will have more that only cost one dollar.  Why get upset over something that is so easily fixable?  In Buddhism we are taught that our suffering is brought about by attachment.  Nothing lasts forever, and I knew the moment I bought the glass that there was a chance it would break at some point.  Therefore, I didn’t get attached to the glass, but I did enjoy it while I had it.  My reaction could’ve been totally different.  I could’ve been angry that the glass broke, and I could’ve allowed myself to get upset over something so small.  However, my friend and I continued cooking, and I have yet to replace the glass.  The empty space in the cabinet where the glass once sat is somewhat a reminder that impermanence is all around us.  Enjoy the things, and the people, that you have in your life now, while you still have them.  Don’t wait until they’re gone to appreciate them or tell them you love them.  Tell them now, today.  Change the way you react to certain situations and happiness is soon to follow! 🙂

Touchdown!

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The Quarterback runs as fast as he can!  He’s at the 40, he’s at the 30, at the 20…TOUCHDOWN!!!

Johns’ team just won the game and he couldn’t be happier!  Sarah, on the other hand, just had her team beat.  She drops her head in shame and exits the stadium.  John continues his celebration out of the stadium along with the hundreds of other fans that are ecstatic that their team just brought home the win!

Let’s look at John and Sarah for a moment.  He is happy, she is not.  Why?  Did the football game make one happy and one sad?  No.  The football game did nothing to affect their happiness, but their reaction to the outcome did.  Had Sarah been a fan of the team that won then she too would be happy.  It’s all in how you respond to the end result.  Say, for example, you get caught by a red light.  You huff and puff, and possibly curse, but then you watch in horror as the car that just went before you gets hit at the next intersection.  You realize that could’ve easily been you, and now getting caught by the red light doesn’t seem so bad.  Now let’s step back.  It shouldn’t take a near death experience to teach you that getting caught by a red light really isn’t that bad.  The next time a red light catches you think, “Hmm, there could be an accident up ahead but the few seconds that this light holds me may keep me from being involved.”  Missing a bus, forgetting your keys, etc. are all things that may benefit you in the end; you just may not realize it.  Let’s say your current relationship ends and you are devastated.  However, three years down the road you  meet that special someone that you know is your soulmate and you begin to wonder what you were doing with your ex to begin with!  The loss of one relationship brought about a better, stronger one.  At the time you didn’t see it that way, but it worked out in the end.

I try to approach all things with this mindset.  I recently read a book that taught you to tell yourself that whatever is happening to you is the best possible thing that could happen to you.  The universe has a way of lining things up to work out exactly as they should.  Trust it, and realize that, although you may not see it now, things may work out in the end.

Getting Off My Butt!

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It’s been a while since I’ve posted, and for that I apologize.

There are some days that my depression hits pretty hard.  Those days really suck.  However, I am reminded that I need to get out of bed or off the couch and find something I enjoy doing.  Those are  the days that I really have to try.  I have to focus on being happy.  That has both pros and cons.  The pros being that I’m happier, but the con is that I actually have to try.  People who don’t suffer from depression sometimes take it for granted that they’re happy.  It becomes quite a task for me sometimes, but it’s always worth it in the end.  I think my fear of getting as depressed as I was before motivates me to get my butt up and do something!

Granted, just getting up and “doing something” is not always going to fix your depression, or make it better, but most times it does (at least for me).  My day starts with making my bed.  If my bed is not made in the morning it seems my whole day is off balanced.  Making my day sets the mood for the rest of my day, and helps prevent me from going back to bed lol.  After my bed is made I start my coffee and take a shower.  I then open the shades, open doors, light a candle, meditate, listen to music, clean, organize, etc. I try my best to be productive throughout the day, so that when I’m ready to wind down for bed I can be content with my day.  I hate feeling like I’ve wasted the day.  As I’ve written before, I stay away from negative news, and only read positive things online.  I also enjoy watching comedies on TV…really anything that makes me smile!  For those of you who have been reading my blog you’ve probably noticed I have a “touch” of OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder).  I like order, neatness, and I like everything to be in its place.  Keeping everything neat is something I CAN control, so it helps a lot with my anxiety which is something I CAN’T control.  It probably sounds crazy, but it works for me! 🙂

During the day I also focus on some of the little things that make me happy or make me smile.  The smell of coffee in the morning, the feeling of my mint body wash on my skin, the accomplished feeling of doing housework, all of these things make me feel better.  I challenge you to focus on some of the little things to help you get through your day.  Even go as far as rewarding yourself for things you accomplish.  Every day is a new day, so make sure you take advantage of it! 🙂

I Love Burning Things!

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I love burning things.  Absolutely love it.  Now, let me explain.

By “things” I’m talking about incense sticks, candles, and sage smudging sticks.  The other night I noticed I was feeling a little down.  I looked around my room and realized it had become a little bit cluttered.  The room felt stagnant and devoid of open, breathable air.  I got up, opened my window, grabbed a box from the basement, packed away a few things, cleaned (vacuumed, dusted, etc) then decided to light a sage stick so that I could smudge my room.  For those of you who aren’t familiar with “smudging” it is the act of using a bundle of sage (sometimes mixed with other things like cedar, sandalwood, lemon grass, etc.) in order to run off any negative energy in the room.  You light it on fire, then blow it out allowing the smoke to fill the room.  I use a leather bound group of feathers to “sweep” the smoke around the room.  The smoke will cling to, and remove, any unwanted energy.  You are literally smoking out the bad vibes.  This may be all in my head, and it may not do a single thing except fill your room with a small amount of smoke, but it works for me.

I’m obsessed with Native American medicine, healing rituals, crystals, chakras, etc. so any chance I get to learn something about any of these things I’m all over it!  Smudging makes me happy, crystal healing/protection, makes me happy, learning about alternative medicine makes me happy.  All these things are things that I enjoy doing and learning about and they bring me some form of happiness.  So why not light a stick of sage and walk around my room, waving the smoke with a feather?  I discovered a year or so ago that I’m an Empath.  I pick up on the energy of others, whether good or bad, and that energy will affect my own.  Yes, for those of you who don’t understand or follow any of this you will probably stop reading my blog at this point.  You probably think I’m nuts, and that’s okay.  You’re entitled to your opinion 😉 I first realized that I’m an empathic person when I had to attend a funeral.  Upon walking in I immediately felt the sadness, my chest became heavy, my lungs tightened, I was very uncomfortable and for the rest of the day I was extremely depressed.  After the funeral I went home and went straight to bed.  I was exhausted.  I didn’t even really know the person who had passed, but the sad and negative energy that I picked up had literally saddened my heart and it truly affected the rest of my day.  The next day I woke up and decided to do something about it.  I smudged my room (and myself), drank some coffee, cleaned, played some upbeat music, and meditated.  I told myself it’s okay to feel for the family and their loss, but there’s nothing I can do about it so I have to allow those feelings to pass.  And they did.  A few years ago the task of attending a funeral could’ve sent me into a deep depression for a few weeks, but the fact that I now know how to handle it means I can be there to comfort others in their time of need without allowing their energy to attack my own.

I’m sure some of you think I’m nuts, but I challenge you next time you’re feeling down to open a window, play some music, pray or meditate, smile, watch a funny movie, get moving/exercise, clean, and allow all the negative energy that’s getting you down to move on.  Don’t let it stay there because the longer you do, the harder it will be to get rid of.  Have a wonderful day!

No News Is Good News

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Why, as a culture, are we so focused on negative news?  The global news, local news, Facebook news, etc. is almost always something bad.  It’s rare that you see happy and positive news going viral.  I hardly ever watch the news, for this very reason, but I do try to keep up with what’s going on in the world.  It seems the good stuff always flies under the radar, but the bad things seem to take a lead role in this production of life.

Just the other day I was watching the news about a man who had killed his 3 month old baby…..HIS 3 MONTH OLD BABY!!!  What the hell is wrong with him?!  I understand that stuff like that happens, and it’s the reality of the world we live in; however, I don’t feel that I need to clutter my mind with that type of negativity.  The rest of the day I randomly thought of that poor baby and how sick that man must be in the head to do something like that.  It made me nauseous.  Those types of things just bring me down and remind me how twisted some people are in this world.  Some of you may say that by avoiding this type of “news” I’m simply shielding myself and preventing myself from hearing about it, and you would be correct.  Speaking from someone who has suffered from VERY severe depression, I have to take an active role in blocking any negativity that could possibly make my depression worse.  This includes depressing news.  If it is something that is really news worthy, and something I need to know about, then I can guarantee I’ll hear about it.  There are a few apps that are on my phone that give you good news, science news, happy news, etc. and I love those apps!  I guess, when it comes to “news”, I tend to lean towards articles versus breaking news.  I’ve learned the breaking news is typically the worst.  I also try not to share negative news on social media, as that means I’m participating in spreading that diseased news.  Only happy news comes through me! 🙂

I challenge you guys to only share and read good news.  Try to stay away from all the negative news about murder, suicide, bombing, etc.  I promise it will make a difference!  I’m not saying to avoid it all together, because being naive and blind about stuff gives the impression that you don’t care.  I’m just saying to not actively seek out negative stuff.

Have a wonderful day!